The motorcycle is one of the all time great two-wheeled, motorized metaphors. I have been riding for so long, sometimes I just conjure the feeling and I am suddenly gliding down a highway, completely at peace. I had one of those moments recently, because I was really troubled by such an obvious behavioral pattern, pretty much globally epidemic and forever. The bike allows me to see clearly and embrace unfettered feelings.
At the risk of sounding like a simpleton, I started thinking about how the majority of us seem to be so much more comfortable hating than loving. A contemporary poster boy for this too easy way of being is our current President and its way more personal than political. He has all the love in the world for himself and none for anyone else. He only cares about what he has to say at any given moment and its shelf life ends immediately following its utterance. The consequences of his words or actions are of no concern, because nothing or no one else matters.
It has taken millennia to perfect this way of being and we have modernized and mechanized the efficacy of this approach. Our propensity for violence has always been a part of our ancient past and archaeologists have been digging up skeletal proof forever. Today, what is it about us, me and you, that makes it so much easier to talk shit about someone, versus saying nothing or something positive? This is my motorcycle moment that has been with me for a while now.
Ten years of therapy doesn’t qualify me to have anything more than an opinion. Seventy-five years of life gives me lots of experience, but no expertise either. However, I am far more comfortable sharing my thoughts than ever before, never forgetting I am no authority, merely a long time observer.
When you turn your back on others, you skip out on feeling responsible, which is bogus, like a counterfeit emotion. Being selfish is so damn easy and I am talking about the bad version, because I believe there is a good variety. The President is the dark version, because while he is insanely self-absorbed, he is incredibly insecure and solely motivated by protecting his eternally damaged self. It took me many years to understand that there is a healthy, life-affirming brand of selfishness. You can only learn to love yourself by embracing your shortcomings, giving birth to a sweet compassion within.
Faulting others comes from not being able to see beyond yourself, a lack of understanding how you got to be who you are and why. If you can’t look inside, it is a given you will be unable to see anyone else. I think it is pretty hard to do, or else we wouldn’t be drowning in hatred and mistrust.
I have been listening to myself and seeing how easy it is to say shit about someone, whether I even know them or not. It feels too easy and familiar. It is so comfortably irresponsible, because it’s like dropping a curtain, end of story, so goddamn lazy. When you care, there is some kind of connection, a recognition of the other, as opposed to a stupid denial.
All the big stuff that happens is directly connected to the small, like fatal illness caused by a little germ. Today, this has elected our President and has been at the heart of every conflict, whether between children and parents, one religion versus another, country against country. It’s because of us and how we treat each other every day.
I haven’t had a chance to try it out yet, because it hadn’t really moved me this way until a day or two ago. Sure, I was thinking about my motorcycle and wondering what the next sign on the road of my mind would be, but I didn’t know where we’d pull over.
I know it sounds so goddamn naive, but if we change the way we treat each other, we can change the world. The deadly truth is, we are running out of time. Whadda ya say?